By Nadine Nirere
I am a young student at the University of Rwanda. For a long time, I silently struggled with a psychosomatic condition that took a heavy toll on my academic journey. It all began when I started experiencing tremors that soon affected every part of my life. My hands and legs would shake uncontrollably, making it difficult to move and write as I used to. What started as a minor issue gradually became a major challenge. Even simple tasks like taking notes, which once came naturally, became nearly impossible.
I visited many doctors, underwent numerous tests, but no physical issues were found. Despite this, my condition worsened, and I began to feel hopeless. Eventually, I was referred to a psychiatric hospital and diagnosed with major depression. They suggested medication, but I refused to accept the diagnosis or the treatment. As my academic performance continued to decline, I sought help from the university’s disability department, but without the necessary medical documents, I couldn’t receive any support. With everything falling apart, I seriously considered dropping out of school.
At the point when I felt like giving up completely, I was encouraged to seek help from the university’s counseling services. After only two sessions, I was introduced to a community-based sociotherapy locally called “Mvura Nkuvure,” and I joined a group that would go on to transform my life. In the group, I finally opened up about the true sources of my struggles. I shared the pain of losing several siblings all of a sudden, unexplained deaths, and how my family believed we were being poisoned. This belief had filled me with deep anxiety and trauma. I also talked about the immense pressure I felt to succeed, especially after my late father told me that I was responsible for the future of our family. The fear of failure, the fear of being poisoned, and my inability to keep up with my studies all pushed me further into isolation and feelings of inadequacy.
The Mvura Nkuvure group became a place of support where I discovered the power of shared experiences. The group’s principle of valuing every participant’s voice made me feel like I belonged, and being surrounded by others with similar challenges helped me regain my appreciation for life. By sharing my thoughts and helping others with theirs, I found comfort and strength. The friendships I built during my time with Mvura Nkuvure became a source of great support.
While my life and health didn’t change overnight, my perspective did. Through my participation in the sessions, I realized that despite the pressure, my family was also a blessing. Seeing other group members who had lost all their parents made me appreciate mine even more. This shift in thinking helped me focus on my own well-being, allowing me to prioritize my studies and realize that I could better support my family after finishing my education.
Gradually, my symptoms began to ease. As I regained confidence, the tremors subsided, and the thought of dropping out of school faded away. Today, I stand strong, and my journey has led me to embrace new passions. I’m now an active member of a church choir, where I find harmony and purpose. I’ve also discovered a talent for speechwriting and poetry, crafting powerful poems, or “imivugo,” that inspire others to face their challenges with determination.